Desire's Dichotomy

February 6, 1994 – Since I slept only two hours I remembered two dreams; lately I have hardly remembered any. I was glad to know of these. I was lying on a lush grassy knoll between West Saanich Rd. and the Pat Bay Highway (of all places). It was a cool clear night but I could not feel it. I recognized the music as what I had been listening to the past week, even though it was in no way the same. I understood him completely, and it applied completely in the moment. My body was filled with sensation, one that I knew was exactly what I had wished for, becoming one on an un-definable level. It was amazing. I don’t think I can properly describe what I felt; I will never forget it.

In the second dream I was lying in the same position on a rumpled bed situated in a room in the exact same way as my parent’s was when my father proposed. In this place the sensation was totally the opposite, and it too had its own strident soundtrack, the epitome of chaos and discord. The air itself was oppressive, and there was an entity in that with the intent of psychically tearing me apart. It was powerful enough to overwhelm me. I reached past myself and declared unreservedly and totally my love for Jesus, and the whole atmosphere of the room was transmuted. The lights came on. A woman appeared in a soft cream coloured, somewhat Grecian dress. Her hair was pulled back and cascaded red past her shoulders. In the dream she was my mother, definitely a guardian. She said there was a serpent in the room, and she searched until she caught it by the tail, pulling it out of the bed. He was dark green and smooth without scales, with a light green underbelly, which reached his prominent lower jaw. His eyes glittered and shone. She held him very carefully by the throat, for he was extremely venomous. She tried to kill him by snapping his neck but couldn’t, it was as if he had no bones at all. So she cast him into a corner of the room and led me out, shutting the door behind us.