June 23rd, 1999

She realized the four proofs had four levels that were easily categorized, the first being the structure or circumstance (the God proof), the second the content in that structure (the conjunction of the symbols/religious circumstance), the third being the process associated with the content (the marriage Bride/Groom pattern), the fourth being involvement in that process (indication of it happening between the two of them). She managed to make it sound dry. On the one hand she realized that all that really mattered was the structure proof, and if she approached it that way she’d protect Bono’s privacy and not overstep if she approached it from this level and ended up being wrong about it all. But what sprung to mind was remembering Marshal McLuhan’s repeated carping that it was the structure itself that bore the implications; the content really had no comparative impacts on individuals; it wasn’t the ideas. In this context, he was dead right, for it was the structure that carried the implication there was a God. In this context, the content level was nigh irrelevant, the conjunction of religious symbols that had started it, -which for her was a big relief, to drop all that by the wayside, her father’s religious claims and associations especially, what it had invoked for her even more than that. But what she realized about herself was that all that mattered to her was the level she had dubbed “the process”; that there was mutual involvement in that process was paramount, and for resolution on that count, she was prepared to wait a long time. It was, depending on the start point she began from, either 7 or 12 years, and counting. What’s a year or two in that context? “We’ve waited this long and we’re still here.”